I haven't been feeling great lately. I feel rundown, always tired, and very, very unproductive. I can't seem to finish anything, or, in some cases, start anything. I'm full of ideas though, and this makes the whole thing more frustrating. There is so much I want to do, all these ideas are dancing around in my head, but I can't seem to grasp them for long enough to do anything about them. I'm frantically making lists, writing sentences, phrases or single words in my journals, but I can't even sit down for long enough for a proper journaling session.
Maybe it's inspiration overload, maybe it's all part of the process and my brain is trying to absorb all these ideas, maybe it's pure laziness.
Whatever the case it seems fitting that we're starting the Wreck this journal bookclub today (Yep, another book club blog, I don't have a life outside the blogospehere). It's scary, even paralyzing, but I think it's probably what I need. This book is way out of my comfort zone. This is a journal with instructions such as:
*Ask a friend to do something destructive to this page (Oh! The control freak in me won't be able to cope!)
*Climb high, drop the journal (Drop? And what do you mean high? How high?)
*Rip it up! (But I was told to take care of books!)
*Spill your coffee here (My coffee? I need to drink my coffee, every single drop!)
*Burn this page (What???)
*This page is for tongue painting (Gross!)
*Tear this page out, put it in your pocket, put it through the wash, stick it back in (OK, no)
If doing things like these doesn't unlock my brain, nothing will. So wish me luck!
Oh, and if you want to join us, go here.
LOL! It will be a challenge but a fun one. Warning: expect to fall into a fit of giggles! I know I will :)
ReplyDeleteOh, I can SO relate!!!
ReplyDeleteHappy wrecking....
i've looked at that wreck this journal book half a dozen times on amazon, but never ordered it.
ReplyDeletei might have to go join in. i've been looking at your pool for rachel's course and feeling that i need to get back to my art journal as well.
i know how you feel with the ideas hopping and not really going anywhere. sometimes the vastness of the internet makes for input overload. and for me, paralysis.
i think i'll go throw my journal in a mud puddle right now, just to try to break out of it. but not my moleskine. or my bookbinder's design one. definitely not those....
It sounds like this adventure is showing up at just the right time. I hope the wreckage opens up some space, creates some lightness and fills you with joy.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad we're adventuring together.
I too am one that understands a bit of what you are going through... My blogs are my current attempt to get out of the rut that I am in!
ReplyDeleteHave fun messing up your journal! I will be looking forward to your posts!
It's going to take courage for me too! But those butterflies in my stomach, haven't felt them in years, so something good is going to come out of it, I just know it!
ReplyDeleteWRO
Good luck B! what happens if you really like it? ;)
ReplyDeleteBeing here is the first step. You have actually taken action. :)
ReplyDeleteI totally get what you mean about 'lack of everything'. I have all these ideas, thoughts, words I'm writing down, phrases that capture me and I'm just waiting for them to all come together somehow...
ReplyDeleteThe book sounds interesting. Gotta check that out!
B, I've had this book for a year and have it safely tucked away amongst my other journaling books. When it arrived from Amazon it was fresh and crips with that new book smell, how could I violate it?
ReplyDeleteI'm going to check the club out right now.
B, I need to ask you something about Rachel's class (I'm signed up too) but don't see your email contact anywhere.
ReplyDeleteCan you please email me at thefragrantmuse@gmail.com?
Thanks!
good luck sweet b- can´t wait to hear about your adventures... no pressure...:)
ReplyDeleteI don't know if I could do it...it just doesn't seem natural to do that stuff to a book. Could be fun though.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the good marathon wishes.
Some marathons anyone can get into (the smaller ones), others you have to qualify for (get a really good time on a previous marathon).
To get into the NYC marathon you can either raise $2500 for charity, qualify, or get in via the lottery (about 1 in 3 who apply get in) - that's how I got in. Pure luck.
Sorry to ramble..it's still got me freaked out!
Thnaks for your support! I think this is going to be difficult but lots of fun!
ReplyDelete@ Julochka, you'll know you are free when you cna trhow your moleskin in a mud puddle :)
@ The Fragrant Muse, do join us! Have added my email to my profile, but will email you when I get home later. I don't have access to my gmail at the office.
Sorry, can't do it. I don't even write in my journals anymore (blogging has taken their place). But I still could not harm any of those empty books. Well, there is one from college that I would like to burn...
ReplyDeleteI am thinking about getting rid of all of our clothes and starting over. That would be liberating...
Wow -- your stuckness sounds familiar -- mmm
ReplyDeleteHad to love your current thoughts, amusing! I'm with you on the how high??
It is hard to wrap your head around it. But I know that it will be fun. Looking forward to wrecking the journal with you!
ReplyDeleteThis seems to me a beutiful journaling session: you couldn't describe any better your feelings swinging from overwhelmed to empty.
ReplyDeleteThanks B - (for your supportive comment) and it's great to see so many comments here with everyone relating to the information overload thing.
ReplyDeleteWeird isn't it ? Too much inspiration can be paralysing.
Can't get to grips with journal wrecking though - good luck with that! x
Remember you can't do it wrong. Play your way through the process and have fun.
ReplyDeleteI am going to burn a book this summer!! The one from the book club that I regretted joining.
ReplyDeleteCan't wait to light it!!
Can´t wait to read how the tongue painting went! ;)
ReplyDeleteHave a wonderful weekend, Jeannette
I love that you included your internal monologue for each page! Some of these are quite scary. I wonder how many I'll be too scared to fulfill.
ReplyDeleteI absolutely hate it when I can't settle to anything and feel permanently disrupted and nerve-jangled.
ReplyDeleteI'm just 30 minutes south of you, and wondering what you are doing on this horrid day. Tomorrow I will be in Oxford, actually -- probably sitting in a cafe if the weather doesn't improve!
Hi Bee, I'm spending the day inside today, so I'm almost enjoying the rain. I'm taking boyfriend to a secret destination tomorrow for his birthday, so I'm also hoping that the weather improves!
ReplyDeleteDo you come to Oxford often?
I can so relate to your entire post....here's to breaking thorugh our ...hiccups? boundaries? whatever they are...to free those things we keep locked up tight inside....
ReplyDelete:-)
This sounds like a good idea because I'm also going through dry patch inspiration-wise but throwing the journal/ drowning it/spilling coffee over it?? I'm not sure I could do that...
ReplyDeleteI hope you had a good weekend despite the weather! And that the secret outing for the boyfriend worked well...
Oh this wrecking will be challenging at times. I'm starting off with the 'easy' pages and will hit the hard ones later. ... but I do so always try to handle books with gentle hand, avoiding cracking the spine. So why did that page jump out at me and say "Do It!"
ReplyDeleteI just saw some pics of "wrecking sessions" on Amazon. I don't know if I can... but it seems to be funny, and liberating! I'll wait for more :)
ReplyDeleteYes to all of what you said! Such true words. Hmm... my wheels are churning.
ReplyDeletexo
You've been tagged!
ReplyDeletecan't wait to see how you "wreck" :)
ReplyDeleteSince you posted about it, have you taken a second step to wrecking it yet? This is fun, no?
ReplyDeleteI have had the book for over a year. It is in pristine shape. But I am ready to start! Soon. Any day now. Really. I am on it. Tomorrow. Or maybe next week. But mark my word.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with the wrecking.